Thursday, May 06, 2010

So, I've been having some trouble at work lately.  My relationship with my boss has been strained quite a bit.  To be honest, I'm not even sure why.  In the last 3 months or so, things have just gotten really bad between us.  I used to be his most favorite employee, and he gave me a huuuge bonus and raise last year to show it.  But it's just been a rollercoaster of dissapointment lately.  I can't seem to please him, no matter how hard I try.  He's taken several of my projects away from me and handed them to other people who have little to no knowledge of the topic.  I constantly get looped into e-mails that are roaring with questions no one knows the answer to, about something I've always been in charge of, and for some reason he's going to other people instead of me.  It's pretty frustrating.  I know the server landscape of this division like the back of my hand, and I've been working in that area for more than 6 months now- decommissioning old servers, getting new servers, helping customers, etc. I've even written reports that show our percentages of old hardware, percentages of virtual servers, and so on- and then I see, in the latest team meeting, that another member of the team has made the exact same reports and is now "working" on it.  I guess all of that work I did was forgotten?  I'm not sure.  It definitely makes me feel small.

One of his biggest gripes with me is that I don't think "high level" enough.  I don't think from a huge over-arching year over year strategy- instead, I solve shorter term problems.  I understand this feedback, and agree with it.  My entire career has been solving small problems.  I feel like I am very, very good at solving these sorts of problems, too- as is evidenced by my promotions.  The relationship is so strained, that he's walked into my office and yelled at me recently, and told me that if I keep butting heads with him, it will hurt my career.  Great...

It sort of feels like I'm wearing out my welcome, or that this environment is getting stale for me.  Opportunity is drying up a little.  I've been looking around at other positions (honestly, I have been for years) and it's sort of spurring me on even more.  Originally my thought was that I'd rather work on projects I'm passionate about- xbox live, or the xbox itself, or maybe zune.  Something I can connect with.  I feel like if I was working on something I was crazy passionate about, I'd probably pour more effort and love into it, and do a better job.  I'm not sure if it's true, but that's what I've been telling myself.  I do pour a ton of effort into my current job, and I feel like I do well, so I don't know if I will/can actually do better.  Anyway- my point is, I've had several informational interviews with teams across the Entertainment & Devices division, and today, I looked and saw the position I've had some informationals about, open up.  So... I'm working on submitting my resume and information to the hiring manager right now.

I pray that God's will be done.  I don't like to be a thorn in the side of my boss. 

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