Monday, May 23, 2005

ugh... us humans can be so predictable sometimes. Its almost disgusting. We trick ourselves into thinking what we do is good and right, even though our conscience is kicking and screaming. We get good at ignoring it. Tricking yourself into believing that one drink won't hurt, or maybe two. Or, tricking yourself that no, you did that for good intentions, so its ok.
Its just so common for us to do things that make us feel like decent people... haha!

I've been struggling with a bit of depression lately, and I've been looking at the usual ways I end up getting out- usually I do something I feel is selfless, like work at church for a bit, or some other volunteer position/piece of work, but I realize its got the wrong intentions. I mean, building computers for poor people is great, but if the only reason I am doing it is to convince myself I am helping others, then its no good. I need to concentrate on the reality of it- making these peoples lives better is the ultimate goal, not being a good christian. If you always concentrate on being a good christian, you don't get the real meaning of it. You do things because thats what christians do, instead of doing things for the real meaning that God should give you. I think the vast majority of christians do that, unfortunately. But hey, it makes them feel good and they will probably go to heaven. Just not change anyones life...
Its not about what you do here on this planet. Its really not. The only thing that matters is you and God, and eternity with him. If you realize that, then your actions will reflect it, and you will be a servant of God.

There is a lot of wisdom out there. A lot of people choose to ignore it, and go about their own thing, because it feels good for now. But people need to open their eyes and realize it isnt about now. Its about forever.

I'll get off my pulpit now, since I know some of you despise me for trying to share what I feel is truth.


Anonymous said...

Why are you sad in the first place? Is it just the going ons within your family, work? When you're sad I feel sad also, I wish you would share with me. I care for you a lot, and truly truly hope for your happiness..

Anonymous said...

Its OK to be on your pulpit, this is your blog. Thats what its for.